Relationship & Love • Paul Enigir • 3 April, 2026
» Updated -1665 seconds ago
3 Reasons Guys Can not Convince Ladies Rightly
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3 Reasons Guys Can't Convince Ladies Rightly
- Money
As a young man, throwing big money or gifts at a lady to dazzle her into saying yes is wrong. You don't buy love. A lady of character isn't swayed primarily by money—even if broke, she's not for sale. If she rejects you, then accepts after a phone or expensive gift? Brother, congratulations—you bought a girlfriend. When the money dries up (or a richer guy appears), she'll drop you fast.
- Influence/Power
Don't use influence or power to win her. A single pastor, for example, shouldn't propose using anointing—do it as a man, her suitor, not her mentor. If you hold influence over her, strip it away first: start with friendship (mentorship ≠ friendship). Win her heart genuinely, without subtle threats or fear.
- Manipulation
Sending her to university in exchange for a dating/marriage promise? Manipulation. Helping a hungry lady but demanding a relationship? That's a business deal, not marriage proposal. Giving ₦100,000 for school fees/rent, then asking her out the next day? No—she's under pressure/duress; it's taking advantage.
If you can help, do it freely. If not, let it go. Propose to someone who chooses you for you, not your help.
As a young man, throwing big money or gifts at a lady to dazzle her into saying yes is wrong. You don't buy love. A lady of character isn't swayed primarily by money—even if broke, she's not for sale. If she rejects you, then accepts after a phone or expensive gift? Brother, congratulations—you bought a girlfriend. When the money dries up (or a richer guy appears), she'll drop you fast.
Don't use influence or power to win her. A single pastor, for example, shouldn't propose using anointing—do it as a man, her suitor, not her mentor. If you hold influence over her, strip it away first: start with friendship (mentorship ≠ friendship). Win her heart genuinely, without subtle threats or fear.
Sending her to university in exchange for a dating/marriage promise? Manipulation. Helping a hungry lady but demanding a relationship? That's a business deal, not marriage proposal. Giving ₦100,000 for school fees/rent, then asking her out the next day? No—she's under pressure/duress; it's taking advantage.
If you can help, do it freely. If not, let it go. Propose to someone who chooses you for you, not your help.
A lady should accept because she loves you, has conviction, and chooses you. Don't force what's false.
Thanks for reading!
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